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No, It Jumped From a Plane
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During a discussion at work about the whale that swam up the Thames & got stuck outside the Houses of Parliament,
"Kool Sanjo, this whale - did it come from the sea?" |
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Overheard by Anonymous, At work in Swiss Cottage
posted Tuesday, 02nd September 2008 |
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Movie / History Buffs
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Having a smoke at work overheard two colleagues on the subject of the movie Troy.
Man 1: "I saw that movie Troy last night."
Man 2: "Oh yea....Who's in it?"
Man 1: "Brad Pitt."
Man 2: "Does he play the part of Troy?"
Man 1: "Nah he plays the other one......" |
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Overheard by cutlaaaa, At work in Hackney
posted Monday, 01st September 2008 |
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A revelation...
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Two girls and a guy on the district line pretty late at night.
Guy: "Anyway, its a fanny thing."
Girl 1: "You can only say the word 'fanny' if you've got one. Have you got a fanny? Clearly not."
Girl 2: "Well I've not got a fanny, I've got a C**t. Can I still say 'fanny'?" |
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Overheard by David, District Line
posted Saturday, 30th August 2008 |
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Friday Night at green Park
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(As the tube doors are about to close and the beeps are going)
Tube staff man: "Please do not try to board the train, the doors are closing. The doors are now closing, don't try to get on OR YOU WILL BE CRUSHED. Thank you!" |
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Overheard by Anonymous, Green Park southern line
posted Friday, 29th August 2008 |
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She made a spectacle of herself......maybe
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Blonde Bartender (OK barmaid): "I'm thinking of getting glasses".
Customer: "For reading or distance"?
Barmaid: "Neither, just to make me look intelligent".
Customer: "They're glasses not a magic wand". |
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Overheard by easysteve, My bar
posted Thursday, 28th August 2008 |
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Someone's telling porkies..
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This happened in Brighton, but hey, it's London by the sea right?
On Brighton pier, walking past some chavs looking at the old pier..
Chav 1: 'It's burnt down innit'
Chav 2: 'Yeah me and Michael set it on fire last time we was 'ere' |
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Overheard by Emily, Brighton Pier
posted Sunday, 24th August 2008 |
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Ooooooooook then...
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Film crew in Spitalfields Market:
Girl 1 - (Holding big plastic bag full of make-up) "I got your text last night! How was it?"
Girl 2 - (walkie-talkie and earpiece) "Horrendous. Made me pay for dinner then proceeded to keep his socks on the entire time we were having sex. Which was crap, by the way. I mean the least you can do after making me pay for dinner is give me decent sex."
Girl 1 - "Oh shit. Another one bites the dust eh?"
Girl 2 - "Nope. Seeing him at the weekend."
Girl 1 - Raises eyebrows. |
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Overheard by Nic, Spitalfields Market
posted Thursday, 21st August 2008 |
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Bigot or fashionista?
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"I've got holes in the ass of my jeans, I'm not going into a gay bar." |
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Overheard by Kimmy, Tottenham Court Road
posted Wednesday, 20th August 2008 |
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The Munchies
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Server: "What can i get you sir?"
Very stoned customer: "Uh.............."
*Long Pause*
" I'll have a double bacon cheese burger...with no bacon... and no cheese" |
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Overheard by Anonymous, Burger King
posted Tuesday, 19th August 2008 |
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Very Pringles
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Two elderly ladies at the bus stop talking about one of their grandsons, who had a heroin problem.
lady 1 - 'He tries to stop taking it, but he can't'
lady 2 - 'Yes, I've heard heroin is a bit like Pringles - very moreish' |
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Overheard by Carol, Bus stop, Mornington Crescent
posted Tuesday, 19th August 2008 |
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